Big Girl Panties Diaries – Entry #50: Fifty Shades of Growth
I didn’t mean to start a series. I meant to write one post, drop some emotional baggage, and move on. That was 49 entries ago.
Somewhere between “just venting” and “accidentally building a brand,” the Big Girl Panties Diaries became my coping mechanism, my calling card, and my no-nonsense mirror.
And along the way, I even wrote about learning to speak up with clarity and kindness — not just in theory, but in the messy, real-life conversations that actually matter (Here's the prequel - Put Your Big Girl Panties On).
🩲 What Writing These Has Taught Me
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Vulnerability isn’t weakness. Unless you’re crying over your keyboard — then it’s just hydration.
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Your voice is worth the awkwardness. (Even when it shakes. Even when you overshare. Especially then.)
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You can tell the truth without telling all your business. Balance is brave.
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Humor is a survival skill. No cape required — just sarcasm and snacks.
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If you wait until it’s perfect, you’ll die waiting.
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People relate more to your mess than your medal. (See: Entry #3, when I unpacked the emotional baggage and forgot the charger.)
The Cringe, The Chaos, The Clicks
Some of these entries still make me cringe. Some were too raw. Some too polished. Some felt like a breakthrough — others like a breakup.
But every single one was real.
The one I almost didn’t post? My Career Ghosted Me. It was probably the most vulnerable thing I ever wrote and shared. Turns out, it hit a nerve — and a truth: people are desperate for a script to say the hard things, kindly.
Then there’s the yoga entry (Can You Touch Your Ego?). What started as a physical stretch turned into emotional whiplash and self-acceptance in spandex.
Or Damsel to Dragon — the one where I traded self-doubt for a flamethrower and stopped apologizing for growing
Growth, in 50 shades — and counting.
New Here? A BGPD Starter Pack
Here’s where to begin if you want to:
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Laugh through the chaos: Create Fun and a Little Weirdness
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Heal through humor: Drop the Potato
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Reflect on identity (and filters): Catfish Chic
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Reconnect with joy: What My Dog Knows
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Show up stronger: The Tower, the Crown, and the Ask
50 Entries In — And Still Learning
I still overthink. I still overshare. I still hit "post" and want to launch my phone into the lake.
But I also lead louder. I love deeper. I ask better questions — and wait for the answers. And I trust that the stories I once wanted to hide… are the ones people needed to hear.
Behind the Scenes: Stuff I’ve Never Admitted (Until Now)
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I’ve drafted entries in the Notes app while crying at the airport.
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Sometimes I post and won't look at notifications until days later (because vulnerability hangovers are real).
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I almost didn’t call it “Big Girl Panties Diaries.” I thought it was too much. Now it’s a movement.
Dear Entry #1 Me...
You had no idea what you were starting. You were scared, cautious, and still trying to please everyone. But you showed up. You told the truth. You clicked “publish.”
Look at you now: messy, magnetic, and fully in your power.
5 BGPD Rules That Still Slap
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Courage > Comfort.
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Say it clearly and kindly — then stop explaining.
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You’re allowed to outgrow your old self. (Even the nice one.)
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If it makes you sweat before posting, it’ll connect after posting.
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Your realness is your reputation.
💬 Let’s Make This a Conversation
I’d love to know:
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Which BGPD entry stuck with you the most?
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What’s your favorite Big Girl Panty moment — at work or in life?
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What should Entry #51 be about?
Here’s to the next 50. To the stories that scare us, the ones that stretch us, and the people who feel a little less alone when we tell them.
If you’ve been reading — thank you. If you’ve been thinking about telling your own story? Pull on your Big Girl Panties… and post. I dare you.