Big Girl Panties Diaries - Entry #121: So… How’s the Consulting Thing Going? Currently Wearing Industrial-Strength Confidence.

I’ve been getting this question a lot lately.

From former colleagues. From new connections. From friends who tilt their head and lower their voice like they’re asking about something… delicate.

“So… how’s the consulting thing going?”

Here’s the honest answer:

It’s going really well. It’s really hard. And it’s exactly what I hoped it would be — just not in the way I naïvely imagined.

The Highlight Reel (Because There Is One)

Since launching, I’ve been deep in the work I love most:

• Partnering with organizations navigating real transformation, not theoretical change

• Spending time in the field with frontline leaders and supervisors (yes, steel-toed boots included)

• Designing change and communication strategies that work in operational reality — not just on slides

• Speaking, writing, and building frameworks rooted in what leaders are actually dealing with when people, process, and technology collide

This part feels aligned. Grounded. Purposeful.

What Consulting Actually Looks Like (Most Days)

It looks like early mornings, late evenings and long drives. Safety briefings and side conversations. Whiteboards, field notes, and listening more than talking.

It looks like asking better questions instead of having faster answers. And earning trust the slow way — by showing up consistently, honestly, and without an agenda.

That’s the part you don’t see in proposals or polished decks. But it’s the part that makes the work stick.

The Part We Don’t Put on LinkedIn Banners

Consulting also means:

• Betting on yourself — publicly and repeatedly

• Living in a constant loop of selling → delivering → refining → selling again

• Building the plane while flying it (with turbulence)

• Making decisions without a safety net, a logo, or a corporate title behind your name

Some days I feel unstoppable.

Other days I think, “Wow. I used to have benefits. And a printer that magically worked.”

Both are true.

What This Season Is Teaching Me

A few lessons are showing up loud and clear:

Experience matters. Clients don’t want theory — they want someone who understands the mess, the resistance, the politics, and the reality on the ground.

Calm is contagious. Especially when everything feels urgent, political, or overloaded. This is where Calmfidence stops being a concept and starts being a necessity.

People are still the point. No tech stack, transformation, or timeline succeeds without leaders who know how to lead humans through uncertainty.

Growth is uncomfortable on purpose. If I wanted easy, I wouldn’t have chosen this. I wanted meaningful.

The Plot Twist I Didn’t Fully See Coming

One thing I didn’t fully anticipate when I started consulting was just how much connection would come with it.

I’ve met so many new people — BGPD readers who feel like old friends, others introduced through mutual connections who clearly understand my love language is “You two need to know each other.”

I’ve reconnected with people I hadn’t spoken with in years — the kind of conversations that pick right back up like no time passed at all.

And I’ve had the unexpected joy of bringing former colleagues together again — reconnecting dots that careers, life, and busy calendars had quietly pulled apart.

That part has filled my cup in ways I didn’t see coming.

It also feels like I’ve reached a point in life where many of my friends and former colleagues are on a similar journey — questioning old definitions of success, stepping into new chapters, and figuring things out in real time.

I’m deeply grateful we have each other to help trip our way through it — to compare notes, laugh at the missteps, steady one another when things wobble, and remind each other we’re not doing this alone.

There’s something powerful about realizing this isn’t a solo act. It’s a shared season.

Because at the end of the day, this work isn’t just about frameworks, strategies, or transformation plans. It’s about people trusting people. It’s about relationships — old, new, and rediscovered. And it’s about creating spaces where connection can happen again.

That has been one of the most grounding, joyful surprises of this chapter.

Why I’m Sharing This

Not because I have it all figured out. Not because this is a victory lap.

But because many of you are standing at your own crossroads — wondering if it’s time to raise your hand, step out, or bet on yourself in a new way.

It’s possible to feel proud and uncertain. Successful and still learning. Aligned and stretched.

And sometimes, the best part of building something new isn’t just the work — it’s the people you meet, reconnect with, and bring back together along the way.

What’s Next

I’m continuing to:

• Partner with organizations navigating complex change

• Speak and write about leadership, resistance, and transformation

• Build tools that make change more human — and more effective

If you’re leading change in an environment where the work is real, the stakes are high, and the people doing the job don’t sit behind desks all day — that’s where I do my best work.

Complex operations. Frontline leaders. Change that has to land, not just launch.

And yes — I’m still wearing my Big Girl Panties. Some days they’re confidence lace. Some days they’re full-coverage, industrial-strength.

Turns out confidence doesn’t always look polished. Sometimes it looks steel-toed.

BGPD Rule:

You don’t need certainty to move forward — you need clarity, courage, and the willingness to learn out loud.

If you want to read a little deeper…

If you’re curious about how I landed here, you might want to start with Big Girl Panties Diaries #120: I Tried to Step Back Into My Old Life… and It Didn’t Fit — the moment I realized there was no un-ringing the bell once you outgrow a version of yourself.

If the idea of identity beyond a title resonates, Big Girl Panties Diaries #108: Who Are You With? I’m With Myself. explores what happens when the logo disappears and you’re left standing on your own two feet.

For anyone who felt the connection and community thread in this chapter, Big Girl Panties Diaries #116: Rebuilding My Village (One Coffee Chat at a Time) captures the quiet power of reaching out, reconnecting, and rebuilding relationships one conversation at a time.

And if you’re leading people through change — or trying to make sense of why transformation feels harder than it should — Big Girl Panties Diaries #112: Upgrade Your People Stack (Before You Touch the Tech) and Big Girl Panties Diaries #113: Forget Bouncing Back — Rebuilding (and Making It Look Calmfident) dig into the human side of change and what it really takes to move forward without losing yourself in the process.