Big Girl Panties Diaries – Entry #115: Stability in the Spin Cycle — Leading Yourself (and Everyone Else) Through Change
Change doesn’t stroll in politely. It blows through like a wind tunnel—new roles, new systems, new expectations, and sometimes, a new version of yourself you barely recognize.
The last few months have felt like standing in tree pose during an earthquake. The only thing steady was the reminder to breathe. Stability, I’ve learned, doesn’t come from what’s around you. It comes from what’s within you.
On the mat, balance isn’t about locking your muscles—it’s about micro-adjustments. Tiny shifts that keep you upright even as the ground moves. Off the mat, it’s the same. Whether you’re leading a transformation or simply surviving one, stability lives in motion, not stillness.
When the Change Is Personal
I remember sitting at my kitchen table last fall— searching for a job, inbox quiet, LinkedIn feed loud—and realizing the only thing I could control was how I showed up that day. So, I opened my laptop anyway. Stability wasn’t the plan. It was the practice.
When your world tilts—career, identity, routine—it’s tempting to grab for control. But real stability comes from rituals, not rigidity. The morning walk. The caffine ritual. The journal entry that no one reads but you.
It’s learning that your worth isn’t tied to a title. It’s your ability to stay present when everything familiar falls away.
If you’ve ever found yourself in the messy middle of rebuilding, you’ll relate to BGPD #113: Forget Bouncing Back — Rebuilding (and Making It Look Calmfident).
When the Change Is Organizational
Leaders have their own spin cycles too—new strategies, shifting org charts, technology rollouts that leave people dizzy. The trick isn’t to stop the spin. It’s to find the rhythm within it—and help others do the same.
“Stability” doesn’t mean “no change.” It means creating enough clarity, consistency, and connection that people can move confidently through change instead of clinging to what was.
Clarity creates calm. Predictability in communication builds trust. A leader who says, “I don’t have all the answers, but here’s what I do know,” anchors people more than a thousand dashboards ever could. (I unpacked more of that in BGPD #109: The Real Connected Worker Challenge — Trust, Not Tech.)
Because in the middle of change, the most stabilizing phrase a leader can say isn’t “Everything’s fine.” It’s “You can trust me to tell you the truth.” (That kind of honesty is what real alignment looks like — see BGPD #110: Leadership Alignment Isn’t About Agreement — It’s About Integrity.)
The Three Anchors of Calmfidence 🧭
1️⃣ Clarity – so people know what’s changing.
2️⃣ Connection – so they know they’re not alone.
3️⃣ Consistency – so they know what to count on.
Whether you’re leading a team or rebuilding your own path, those three anchors keep the spin from becoming a spiral.
Change won’t always calm down. But you can. And that’s where real transformation begins.